EGP READING
The last week or so I have been simultaneously in Genesis/Exodus and Mark/Luke. It is so amazing to read these books side by side and see the tapestry of God's weaving everything together in history and as preparation for Jesus. It has been a tough time for me the last few months and many challenges have been extremely painful and have often felt overwhelming. There are days I did not know if I could continue on. There are days I trust God and then days I have not. I am not proud of the lack of belief, it is just that it is true. I have always loved the Old Testament, their stories are just like ours. So, as I have been in Genesis and Exodus along side the Gospel, God continues to reveal so many things to me; and with that comes PEACE.
While this trial has been occurring, I have been reading about Moses and the children of Israel. WHAT AN INCREDIBLE PICTURE each time I read it is new and a blessing. Throughout Genesis and Exodus I have seen again and again God's hand in life, circumstances, and the discipline of His children. Some of it is wonderful, some of it is painful. I have felt in "bondage" in some areas of my life for a long time.God comforts me in Exodus 2:23-24 it says:
"And the sons of Israel sighed because of the bondage, and they cried out: and their cry for help because of their bondage rose up to God. So, God heard their groaning; and God remembered His covenant...."
I have felt this "bondage" off and on for 8 years! But here I see my God is one who listens! He has not ignored my cries it is just that it is not HIS TIME. (ugh) There are times it has been better in "bondage" sometimes that can feel "normal" (the comfort of "Goshen" and "food and water" etc,). But the truth is I am still in Egypt and not in Canaan. The pain of being in that place (and still there somewhat) for 8 years is pale in comparison to the 450 years the Israelites were in Egypt! How my flesh wants out from the pain so easily! But, what I see about God's character alongside this is that HE IS THE DELIVERER! It is HIS TIMING and HIS WILL that determines the time we are set free - not mine! It comforts me to know no matter the length of time He is working on our deliverance whether it is here or in eternity. He hears me when I cry out and when it is HIS time He will move.
Another thing I am seeing at this time, is God's direct hand in the DIFFICULTY/WORSE CIRCUMSTANCES! (not that I did not know this before it is just He is applying it again to my heart).
God literally PLANS for Pharaoh to have a hard heart! He knows that with His plan to deliver Israel on the horizon, He will create an environment that gets WORSE for them! There will be more persecutions for the Israelites (build bricks without straw etc,) and He does not STOP that from happening - in fact He plans it all! So, as I read this I see how DELIVERANCE comes with a fiercer battle! Satan does not want us to be free, he does not want the slaves out of Egypt. So, it seems to me ( I did not see this before in the weeks I was so overwhelmed) that the worst part often comes right before the opportunity God has for us to walk through His door in obedience. I am so saddened by my lack of faith during this time; it was feeling like the Israelites making "bricks without straw." But God is so faithful and good, patient and longsuffering, that He is revealing it to me now. The peace I am having is from continuing to be in His Word for Him to speak to me and in prayer. Circumstances have changed a little, but not much. Yet now I see His hand in His timing and His way. It is for me to submit and to get out of the way. Part of that includes allowing other Christians (safe ones) to be involved through prayer and support, as well as allowing God to bring in possible waves of trial and pain.
Psalm 27:1
"The LORD is my light and my salvation; Whom shall I fear? The LORD is the defense of my life; Whom shall I dread?"
Being in the WORD is refreshing to the soul. It is where God speaks to us. But I have also realized that my reading has not been partnered enough in deep submissive, detailed prayer. I am asking God to make me a woman this year hidden in Him, in that secret place - deeply in prayer. Will you pray with me? Can I pray with you?
linda
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